1231 Get This, Pt. 2

program date: 
Sun, 12/30/2007

 

12/31/07 Get This

Chris Andreae

 

  1. Since how many years now?  People have been riding around on bicycles and driving cars, one would imagine that generally cyclists and motorists would have learned a few simple, civilized safety rules.  But one would be wrong.  Instead the State is obliged to hurtle into the fray and pass more laws governing stupid behavior.
  2. Cyclists now can avail themselves of a welter of vanity plates in much the same way that motorists make the cops’ job all that much easier.
  3. Peter Bergel, a constituent and activist, or an activist/constituent, if you will,  was attempting to visit the offices of senator Gordon Smith when security guards called the police and had him arrested for trespassing – on taxpayers’ property.  So Bergel is suing PGE (PGE is the landlord of said Smithian facilities, but one could easily be forgiven in assuming the huge power company had something to do with Republican Smith…It just makes sense.) for violating the man’s constitutional rights.  Notice how our private security forces are getting ‘roid hot at citizens in numbers not even the cops can match?
  4. Mental health outpatient facilities across the State are closing down, bed by bed turning the addled and addicted onto the streets.
  5. Good News & Bad News:  FEMA closed its disaster recovery center in St. Helens – mercifully before it head the chance to cause the kind of damage FEMA dished out to the unfortunate residents of New Orleans.
  6. A Multnomah County program is confronting head-on the head-scratcher:  Why do African-American women consistently give birth to underweight babies?  Turns out that the answer is racism, poverty and sub-standard medical care.  The County has actually seen fit to address the medical care issues and birth weights are on the rise.  Alas, the poverty and racism remain.  Whose problem is that?  Yours, mine, all of ours…
  7. Search and Destroy:  This is a story that journalism can in no way improve upon:  A man in Wenatchee, Washington  after driving the wrong way down a street and finally totaling his car, when asked by the police Wha Happen?  Had one word:  “Pterodactyls.”
  8. In other ‘enormous, cold-blooded creatures with tiny brains from the ancient past’ news:  Michael Bloomberg is running for president as an “independent.”  Independent of what exactly?  Mike has ”looked at love from both sides now…” so to speak:  He’s been a Dem.  He’s gone GOP.  So why not Independent?
  9. A California man –  Not Arnold… has been saving his trash all year so he can get an idea of just how much trash he actually creates.  And the envelope, please:  It’s a lot.  96-square feet to be precise.  He’s going to get together with an artist and turn his year’s waste into a work of art.  (Waste Not, Whatnot)
  10. Garbage In, Garbage Out:  Last year, in addition to producing a record mountain or garbage, also set new highs for date breaches. 
  11. Morning After Pall:  Conservative groups in California are trying to block the State’s new anti-bias laws from going into effect January 1st.  They have until the 10th to scrape together 500 thousand signatures. 
  12. Bank On It:  A federal court in Chicago overturned a $156 million dollar jury award against a former Muslim charity, the Holy Land Foundation for Relief and Development.  This dates back to 1996 when David Boim was killed while visiting the West Bank.  As yet no cases have been brought against any members of AIPAC or the multitude of charities rounding up money on behalf of Israelis, or, for that matter, the Bush administration (Excuse me, did I say, “administration”?  I meant Bush Crime Spree….).  Anyway, no one is suing the Israeli/American government or individual citizens for the genocide being carried out against he Palestinian people who are literally and figuratively being ground into the dust.
  13. Bush rejected another war bill last week.  Delaying the signing amounts to a de facto veto.  This bill is a very interesting mess of fish – red herrings for the most part.  In essence, Bush doesn’t like it because it would channel reconstruction money into Iraqi hands rather into the talons of American contractors.  Halliburton?  Hello?  Can you hear me?
  14. Brattleboro, Vermont is considering a Measure to have George Bush and Dick Cheney impeached.  (Shit, how hard can this possibly be?  What have they not done to merit impeachment and so much more?  The charges are mounting up as the days wind down for this most lamentable of all administrations.  And as they do, listen and you will hear the sound of presidential pardons ringing forth across the land, and the wheels on the old wagon train squeaking East, into the sun rising over the hulking new Halliburton Headquarters filling in the sky over the United Arab Emirates.  That’s where they’ll be, safely beyond extradition…)
  15. Brattleboro Man:  This is a story that began back on December 1st, lit out for DC, and is due to arrive on January 10th.  Yes, Brattleboro is back in the news:  John Nirenberg is walking 500 miles to the nation’s capit-oil to demand impeachment.  (‘Nirenberg, eh?  Kinda reminds one of ‘Nuremburg’.  Or perhaps my mind is playing those cheeky monkey tangos on thee synapses again.)
  16. 2007:  Whatever else can be said about it, climate change was the major chord.
  17. Even John ‘Mad Dog’ Bolton thinks that the US played a role in Benazir Bhutto’s assassination – just not the role that you and I imagine it played…)
  18. Bhutto’s son is going to take over the Pakistan People’s Party duties just as soon as he graduates for Oxford.  (The last time the US had a leader who had been    anywhere near a place of learning on that level was when Bill Clinton was a Rhoads Scholar…And he got impeached because of a blowie.  Think about it:  We live in a country where a man can get away with murder and yet be prosecuted for the theft of “sports memorabilia.”)
  19. Bin Laden sent New Years Greetings in the form of a warning that it would be in everyone’s best interests if someone reined the Israelis in a bit.
  20. Walk Like And Egyptian:  Palestinian pilgrims on their way back from Hajj ran into a bit of rough at the Egyptian border, thanks to…Well, you know how this one goes…
  21. Even Arlen Specter says that Syria wants peace with Israel.  (Translation:  “Please don’t let those madmen bomb us…”)
  22. The Kenyan elections went South.  Kibaki had a slim – and somewhat suspicious - lead as of the weekend.  He is, after all, the elder statesman here and Odinga is the ‘upstart rival, but hey…Toto, I Don’t Think We’re In Ohio Anymore.

 

 

 

 

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